Thursday, October 8, 2009

The New Normal

I know you've heard about my friend, Lisa. She was killed on September 11 in a brutal and terrible way. Slowly but surely we are learning how to live again. We're trying to get back in the "groove" of life when everything seems to have changed so much.
I've learned so many great things and met and reconnected with so many wonderful friends during this tragedy. As hard as it's been I can look back now and realize that God was preparing me for what I'm sure He knew was inevitable. Scripture that didn't seem to make sense at the time but was clearly preparing me for the stressful time ahead.
God placed David in our lives. He protected Lisa to the best of his ability and now protects our Elizabeth. He also gave us Sarah, our legal "interpreter". Sarah keeps me steady when all I want to do is freak out. Tammie. Because we were both so close to Lisa I can say things to her that she understands like no one else could. I'm grateful for my new friend, Leslie. Lisa wanted us to meet and so now we have. It's like her gift to me... someone with a sense of humor as off course as mine! :)
It's amazing to me how God takes care of every little thing. How He places people in our lives and how He anxiously awaits me to allow Him to give comfort in my time of need.
So now we are on to the new normal, as my friend Elaine puts it. Realizing more and more the impact Lisa had on our lives and being thankful for it. The lesson we have learned is that life is short and we only have today to make our impact on people. There were 400+ people at my Lisa's memorial. That's the kind of impact that I want to have. What kind of legacy do you want to leave? Today is the day. Tomorrow may never come.

7 comments:

  1. Dorene,
    It sounds like you are doing so good and seeing some beauty despite the ashes. I'm continuing to pray for you. I praise God that he is putting people in your life to help you through this. I'm so glad you don't have to do this thing alone. Call me or stop by if you need anything. Hope to see you tomorrow at library time.

    Love,
    Jackie

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  2. gasp! library time! joe's dad and aunt are coming to visit tomorrow for the weekend! ug! maybe you wouldn't mind bringing your babies out here on monday or tuesday afternoon to visit. darn! i'd love to spend time with you! why is this never working out? let me know, ok?

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  3. Shoot, I just now saw this comment, sorry!

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  4. Hi, just checked your blog cause I was thinking about you wondering how you're doing. (I don't do FB or MS) Sometimes it's hardest after the busy work is over. Every time I see a navy blue BMW, I think of Lisa. I don't even know if she still had that car, but they make me think of her, and then you. Hugs, kim

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  5. You're so right, Kim. It has gotten really hard lately. Counselling is both good and bad as it makes me come face to face with some tough issues. I suppose it's natural to question God at this time, it just feels disloyal and I am at odds with myself. Life goes on and I'm confident that God has a future for me. Yeah, Kim, she still has the BMW. I don't think anyone is driving it, tho. So many things are potential evidence...

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  6. Dorene, Hi, I'm Jackie's sister, Stacie. She shared with me this story and it just broke my heart. I can't imagine the pain that you must be going through. How does your brain even process such evil and brutality.

    I have prayed for you and will continue. It is finally nice to "meet" you. I have heard so much about you. I didn't realize you had a blog! I'll be following!

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  7. stacie, i'm so grateful for your prayers! we often say that we can't imagine where we would be without all of the prayers from everyone. it's been so difficult. i see how close you and jackie are (naturally) and i miss lisa very much then. i know you do, but treasure EVERY SINGLE moment. i'm so grateful for the many memories i have left and that i get to spend eternity with her someday. i'm grateful to "meet" you, too! :)

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